Fighting to hold onto you
by CriminalMinds99
Summary: They were connected, and not just by love, it was so much more than that. They were soul mates. She was slipping away and he had to fight to hold on. Warnings inside.


**So this is my first story on this account and it's only a one-shot but, anyway I am here**

 **I do not own Criminal Minds or the characters only the plot which came entirely from my brain.**

 **Credit to my best friend Sarah for the title!**

 **Warning- Character Death**

 **Read and Review!**

It was like we were physically connected. If I ever felt pain, she always seemed to feel it too and vice versa. Like the day I lost a close friend to the battle of cancer, instead of sitting with me while I cried, she sat and cried with me, like she too had lost a friend, though she never actually knew him. Or the day she told me about her sister and the day she found her, dead in the bathroom, I couldn't help but share her heart ache as we cried to each other. Some would say that we just knew each other so well and that it just comes to us, the shared pain, but I believed it was much more than that. You could say we were soul mates, and it was fate that brought us together. At first, I never realised but today, it finally made sense. As I stood across the room from her, a crazed man with a gun in the middle of us, I felt a sharp pain in my chest as I watched the bullets rip through her thin blouse, piercing her silk skin underneath. It was as though we had both been shot, and the pain she felt suddenly transferred itself to me. I remember holding my chest as a ran to her side, as if I was stopping the bleeding from my own body as well as hers. Watching her life slip away before me brought me incredible pain, pain that I never thought I could feel before. I gripped onto her pale hand, wiping away tears from her crystal blue eyes as she looked over at me. They always say when you are losing someone your life with them comes forth, memories flood your memory, but for me it was the complete opposite, it was my future that had flashed before me. A future without her by my side, a future in this career without her with me every step of the way, a future where I sat alone on that porch at old age, praying death would take me soon so I could join her once again. But no, that was not the future I wanted, not the one that I had planned. I had planned to propose to her in a months' time on her 30th birthday, I had planned for us to be married on a beach like she always wished, I had planned out our honeymoon in Paris so she could feel closer to her sister who always prayed to live there, I had planned for it to be us both on that porch at old age, watching our grandchildren race around the garden. I had it all planned out right there for us and now it was slowly fading away. I barley felt the paramedics beside me working to stop the bleeding, because all I could feel was her hand in my own, all I could see was her face radiated with pain. I placed a kiss on her forehead, feeling how cold her skin had gotten in such a short time, and whispered in her ear,

"I love you JJ, so much" And she faintly replied,

"I love you too Derek"

Her voice was strained, quiet as she tried to control her breathing which was raspy and in short breathes. Her eyes shed more tears as she looked to me. I could see her trying to fight away the pain and felt tears spill down my own cheeks, mirroring hers. She had to hold on, she couldn't leave me, this was not how it was supposed to go. We were supposed to grow old together, die of old age; never would I have thought the job would rip her away from me so soon. My eyes drifted to the paramedics as they tried to stabilise her, hooking her up machines as she lay lifelessly on the floor. It was if it happened in slow motion, as suddenly her hand went limp in my own, the machine showing her heart beat flat lining. I cried out in agony as her body jolted with electricity, the men working hard to gain her heart back again. I felt arms wrap around my shoulders as I cried, screaming for her to come back. After minutes of watching them work, they slowly sat back, shaking their heads. Then they called it.

"Time of death, 5.49pm"

I pulled myself away from the arms that kept me steady and buried my head into her blonde hair, crying for her to come back to me. I could still hear those four little words on her blue tinted lips, I could still smell her perfume I got her for Christmas on her blood stained skin, and I could still feel her presence with me although I know she is truly gone. I could see our wedding before me, the wedding that was now never going to happen. I could see how her smile lit up the beach as I placed the ring on her finger, I could hear those two words as she held my hand in hers. _I do_ … I could see her new name printed on the certificate as they signed off their life together. _Mrs Jennifer Jareau Morgan_.

The pain that we shared was much more than anyone could ever imagine, because the second her heart stopped, so did mine.

 _I believe in the immeasurable power of love; that true love can endure any circumstance and reach across any distance- **Steve Maraboli**_


End file.
